I feel very insecure today. I believe I am transforming into something new, may be better. My life has changed; tomorrow my values might change as well. You do not understand what I am going through. I feel, soon nothing will matter to me. No, I am not talking about Nirvana. I am not even leaving my worldly possession. Do I really have any? Come on, that’s a secondary question. I know it’s not going to matter to any of you. And as if I am dying to make it matter to you.
Az chu Jummah. Fifth day of week and ongoing protests as well. I just despise this illegal transfer of land. I am getting frustrated; I am running out of stocks. I sipped last can of Rani Juice (Peach Flavor) yesterday morning. My 3 year old cousin ran away with the last ‘five star’ chocolate today morning. Last few salted peanuts are left in the peanut box. No, this is no NASA thing. Last evening when I went out to have a walk and more than that to find a shop where I could buy my stocks, I could only see few medical shops open. For some time I thought I would buy some vitamin, calcium and iron injections and pills. I might die of hunger. But if I do not stop eating all this, I will surely die of over weight. But then who cares. All I am worried about right now is illegal transfer of land.
All I could smell today is burnt rubber and all my eyes can feel is brunt of tear gas. It has been busy few days for every one. The Indian army has killed few more young people. Government is still unmoved except the opposition and coalition partner who are trying to take political mileage out of the issue for the “so- called” elections to come. Did I tell you, I even despise elections under occupation? Yes, I do and every one except India does. Newspapers are filled with same. Every one talking on same lines but action is yet to be seen except of Pro-Freedom leaders, who have with masses taken to roads.
One good thing which has come up in these protests is people are leading themselves, they no more feel handicapped for the instructions. Some how, Kashmir is finally maturing in its existence. It is a “Revolution” indeed. Time is coming up to expectations. Even the mob is behaving in a civilized manner, pretty much understanding the consequences. Every protestor I believe has framed a complete picture of what’s happening and what can happen. Protests can’t get civilized than this one.
Phew, why do we have to talk about these things? Let’s get back to stories. Yes, I have started loving “story telling”. I heard some one saying it’s an art. I am learning it too. Would you hear something from my childhood? Where do I start? Okay.
There was a guy, yeah the one who ran away with the team money. Every one of us friends hated him, he always scared us. So one day, we had Crack down. It meant walking in a single line across the black gypsy, like we did in school, passing our Sikh teacher who would check our hair with his stick; we always wondered why any one didn’t check his hair. We had seen him with his hair open once on a camp. If the gypsy blew horn, the one standing in front was taken away. Many have not returned till this day. While this guy was walking towards the gypsy, all of us prayed that horn should take him away from us for some time. The guy finally reached the place and horn blew. We jumped in excitement, only to get a fierce look from our elders.
Next few days were so good, we played our hearts out. But we never saw that guy again. Some time after, I heard his left leg was broken and he had to use a walking stick since. I really felt bad that day. I wanted to confess to him. All of us wanted to, but then they say “Life is like that”. Many a times we don’t even get second a chance. But I know things will get better in a jiffy, I just know things will get better. How can they not? Some innocent and beautiful people have given blood for the cause and the cause is just.
I don’t know if I can go on a walk today, things have heated up again. I feel so sorry for myself. I can’t even have a Coffee, with Mutton Shwarma and Chocolate Truffel. Coffee Arabica will be so lonely without me. Even Robusta would do today. Let it be, I will wait till the end.
